Garbage in your park? Rome decides if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!

'La Bellezza sulla Monnezza'
Beauty wins over the Garbage Beast
photo from RomaToday

In an audacious move by Roma Capitale - or the Rome Municipality, the City decided to seriously 'think out of the box' and take on a new approach to garbage collection. By removing all the garbage cans* from one of its rather large parks. This experiment was launched on May 1st, and for the most part, was deemed somewhat successful. While more people brought their garbage out of the park nearer the large containers, they did see a larger accumulation around the canisters still left standing.
"The fact that people actually bothered to bring the garbage to one place rather than just leave it where they were picnicking for us is a huge success," remarked the AMA Garbage guys.  We hope that it catches on and more and more people who enjoy the park, actually take out what they put in.
Two months on, however, residents are reporting more and more garbage going uncollected than ever before. To the point that one of the rivers feeding into the Tiber has its very own garbage dam - made entirely of plastic bottles and reeds. 
"If nothing else, we've lightened the load on our work hours and workers. I mean, driving around the park every once in awhile and pretending we were doing it on a weekly basis was really maddening for all concerned. Now we just don't do it. This is one for transparent government."

*True story - only the quotes are made up (as usual)

European Taxi Drivers Uber-challenge: Beat them at their own illegal tricks

In a bizarre twist of karma, Taxi Drivers throughout Europe staged a strike to express their dismay with potential passengers, who, in their opinion, are not respecting the law. Uber, the car sharing app was launched in Europe, but no one knew about it until the taxis decided that passengers actually paying the right price for trips around town might threaten their monopoly on shaking down customers outright.  
As one taxi driver put it, "Are you kidding me? They pay only about 30 bucks to hop all in one car from the airport.  We charge over 100 for that kind of service - and with it, we give you a tour of all Milan or Rome before getting you to your destination. Beat that, Uber!"
In Italy, taxis were on strike, but no one even noticed, since they sit at their stations all day instead of actually carting passengers around town like in many other metropolises.  Another driver put it simply, "We can sit around all day if we like.  We just keep raising the rates. You know, it helps us offset the lack of passengers - we don't know why they'd prefer low-cost, heck, even air-conditioned vehicles. That's not what urban mobility is about, ya know what I mean?"
Another added, "Look--I make my living out of cheating customers. It's just how it's done. Foreigners? I double the meter. Sometimes I turn it off altogether. Or tell 'em it has to be a fixed rate for short distances. Bags, extra. Inside the city, outside the city, if you can double the meter at least three times a day, you're making it good. But it's not that easy. You think we're going to let these guys come in and provide a fixed low-cost price list for transport services?" 

UBER is a pusher in corrupt Milano - Outlaws
(irony not included)

But UBER, had the last laugh. I had no idea 'til today that the service even existed in Europe. Post-European wide strike, subscriptions went up by 850%. And just to show the taxis that they are a company well-versed in supply & demand, they even decided to lower their tariffs by 20%.  After all, everyone knows that taxi cab advertising garners the greatest number of hits. 

La Grande Bellezza Receives Pulitzer Grand Prize - Journalism's Highest Honor

§  La Grande Bellezza  §

Sorrentino's Oscar-winning & film and tribute to Fellini has been recognized by cultural commentators the world over for giving the world a new nauseating description for italophiles of the 21st century.  The title of his film, displacing the hackneyed La Dolce Vita when referring to every single aspect of Italian life, sweet or not, we now have a new term of phrase.  

According to Google, La Grande Bellezza has already been used in the English and Italian press to describe everything from a night out in Rome to walking tours to Italian runway models and even the Detroit Auto Show - Really?! - over 6.789.438.000 times (and counting).  So much so, the NYTimes is considering mounting a fast-paced time clock just ringing up whenever someone - anyone - from Saskatchewan to Seattle uses the phrase in a blog, article, newsletter, profile, you name it.  A spokesperson for the Times commented, "Well, this is so much more important - I mean, it took centuries for Et Tu, Brutus? to die out.  We think La Grande Bellezza won't even become nauseating until at least 2340."

It's been said that Fellini can stop shouting from his grave, "Ironia!  Ironia!  Ow many times must I cry out in desperation, Irony!" and rest finalmente in peace.  As for the Pulitzer committee, starting this April, they have decided to rename their esteemed prize, La Grande Bellezza.